Thứ Hai, 29 tháng 4, 2013

When Plans Fall Through, Other Good Things Happen.

It was sometime in the Spring of 2003, and I was trying to figure out how I should fill my schedule for the following school year. I had been offered an opportunity to join my friends in an annual Singapore culinary adventure, which meant that I was required to enroll myself into the Culinary program for my grade 11 year. While I wasn’t particularly interested in learning to create semi-flavourful lunch meals and other high school cafeteria specialties, it was an easy course that allowed me an extra spare block on occasion while also allowing me first dibs towards a trip to Singapore, so I signed up for the class.


There were a lot of people who made it perfectly clear that not going on this trip could be considered a big mistake. Previous travellers, friends of friends, and the regular chaperone (the high school chef) showed off albums full of absolute paradise and told stories of exotic adventures; they used collections of fascinating souvenirs and trinkets as means of excessive enticement. Everyone who had any connection with previous travels to Singapore made sure to share as much proof as they possibly could to make it perfectly clear (as the crystal clear tropical waters) that this trip would make next year’s spring break one to never forget…


Except, that I never actually made it to Singapore (and to this day, I’ve yet to go). After getting my hopes up by agreeing to pay for my Singapore excursion, my parents changed their minds and sent me to the Philippines to visit family instead at the last minute. As if missing out on a really cool trip with friends wasn’t painful enough, my trip to the Philippines with my mom was less than ideal. To add onto my misery, my ecstatic classmates who could barely contain their excitement about going to Singapore ended up on two of the same flights as me to and from our (separate) trips to Asia. Despite how upset as I was about the whole ordeal, there was a silver lining to the entire situation: If I hadn’t been fully convinced to take a Singapore spring break vacation, I likely wouldn’t have opted to take Cafeteria 101 as one of my grade 11 electives. If I had never decided to spend one day of every week learning to create semi-gourmet high school lunches, I would have never met best friend for life while perfecting our high school’s ‘secret’ recipe for the ultimate chocolate chip cookie.


In another instance, I fell in love with a boy 3 years ago and we quickly started to make plans for our future. We discussed potential baby names, compromised over how furry our pets would be, and talked about how happy we’d be in our home while growing old together. I brought him to traditional family events and opened his eyes to Filipino culture, while he drove me halfway across the country to meet his family and introduced me to his roots of small town prairie life. We were very serious about planning the rest of lives with one another, but we barely made it past our one year anniversary. We’re actually no longer on speaking terms after going our separate ways, but I’ve ironically developed a fierce bond with his mother. Although her son and I are no longer an item, she and I keep in touch on a frequent basis and rely on each other for good conversation, loving support, and unconditional love. Our relationship has little to do with the one I shared with her son; him and I obviously weren’t meant to be, but perhaps he came into my life to introduce me to one of the most inspirational women I could ever hope to call a good friend.


Life as I often imagine it, hardly goes as I planned for. Romances flop, friendships fizzle, and new opportunities appear in my life in spurs of passing moments. From BC to Alberta and back again, I’ve whimsically fallen on great opportunities to meet friends, lovers, and some of the most exhilarating and positively influencing people on this planet. Looking back, I’ve realized that most of these relationships were quite spontaneous and coincidental. I’m blessed to have connected with the diverse selection of people I know on so many levels, because they’ve changed me for a better person and every single one of them has enhanced my life so many ways.


Years ago, I thought I had my future all figured out. I believed that all my beloved high school friends and acquaintances would stay with me as every year continued into another, and that all my hopes and dreams would come true just as I had grown up imagining they would. I had a well thought out timeline of my life where I would have a soon-to-be husband, my very first home, plans for mini-me’s and my dream car in the driveway by . I also envisioned that I would have a photo album of sorts tucked away somewhere, filled with colourful memories of my trip to Singapore and a tropical vacation on the island of Phuket.


To be honest, I don’t have much of what I just made note of and I’m not disappointed. For every potentially amazing encounter that never happened, something just as equally awesome or better took it’s place. With every friendship or love that faded away, I found a new friendly face to share my life with. The decisions I didn’t plan for took me on the most beneficial and irreplaceable affairs, and the changes I never expected gave me wonderful opportunities to take my life to higher places.


I climbed out of bed this morning, pondering my schedule for the day and wondering what it might bring me. I’m currently single with my career on hiatus, and I’m in the daily process of networking with new contacts and planting small seeds for big ideas that could potentially change my entire future in positive ways. In the present moment, my life is absolutely nothing like what I prepared myself for. The more I assess my situation, the more I embrace the possibility that maybe that’s exactly how it was always supposed to be.


There’s nothing wrong with making a map of your future, while setting goals and figuring out where you want to see yourself in days, months and years to come; that’s a positive practice to keep yourself in line with progressing and growing as an individual. It’s just that, when things don’t continuously go your way and according to every fine detail of your ‘flawless’ plan, don’t get all caught up and lose yourself in massive frustration. Life has it’s own plans for you, whether you like it or not. That’s not to say that you have no choice in where you’re headed – but you can’t control it completely. All you can do is ease your tense shoulders, take a deep breathe and enjoy your every moment of the life you’re living. Let it happen and allow it to reveal the magic surprises it’s got stored away just for you.


Who knows what might happen and who you’ll meet…

Imagine what good things might come your way, when life doesn’t go according to plan.



When Plans Fall Through, Other Good Things Happen.

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